3 question hack to support yourself and your partner when having a disagreement
The nature of our relationships play a big role in our lives, from our day to day mindset to our mental well-being. Use this 3-question hack to help you navigate disagreements; take a step back and assess if you are being present to your partner and bringing your whole self to the conversation.
Loneliness and our Self Protector
“When we feel isolated, disconnected and lonely we try to protect ourselves. In this mode, we want to connect, but our brain is attempting to override connection with self-protection. That means less empathy, more defensiveness, more numbing, and less sleeping. (Brown, pg. 54).
Common examples of self protection can look like this: binge watching television, spending more time than you normally would on social media, over/ under-eating, over/under exercising, substance use, lashing out, isolating yourself from friends/family, feeling a lack of motivation, self-doubt, and so on.
Loneliness is a common symptom of today, and not something that you have to live with forever. Therapy can support the bridge between the Self Protector which we all have inside us at times and the action of connecting with the aliveness in our ourselves and in connection to others.
“Unchecked loneliness fuels continued loneliness by keeping us afraid to reach out.” (Brown, p. 55). For more information and or support text me here to schedule an online video or phone appointment.
Brown, B. (2017) Braving the wilderness: The quest for true belonging and the courage to stand alone. New York: Random House.